My wife and I are watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we were in bed. I turned to her and said, "Do you want to have sex?" "No," she answered. I then said, "Is that your final answer?" She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying "Yes." So I said, "Then I'd like to phone a friend."
And then the fight started...
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After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later. The woman said, "Unbutton your shirt." So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said, "That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me." And she processed my Social Security application. When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office. She said, "You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten disability, too."
And then the fight started...
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Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made my lunch, grabbed the dog, and slipped quietly into the garage. I hooked up the boat up to the truck, and proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour. The wind was blowing 50 mph, so I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad all day. I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed. I cuddled up to my wife's back, now with a different anticipation, and whispered, "The weather out there is terrible." My loving wife of 10 years replied, "Can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that?"
And that's how the fight started...
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My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby table. My wife asked, "Do you know her?" "Yes," I sighed, "she's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking right after we split up those many & years ago, and I hear she hasn't been sober since." "My God!" says my wife, "Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?"
And then the fight started...
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I rear-ended a car this morning. So, there we were alongside the road and slowly the other driver got out of his car. You know how sometimes you just get soooo stressed and little things just seem funny? Yeah, well I couldn't believe it.... He was a DWARF!!! He stormed over to my car, looked up at me, and shouted, "I AM NOT HAPPY!!!" So, I looked down at him and said, "Well, then which one are you?"
And then the fight started...
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I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my order first.. "I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please." He said, "Aren't you worried about the mad cow?" "Nah, she can order for herself."
And then the fight started...
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A woman is standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror. She is not happy with what she sees and says to her husband, "I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment." The husband replies, "Your eyesight's darn near perfect."
Governor Deval Patrick announced yesterday that in producing his emergency measures to balance this year's budget and in his budget proposal for the next fiscal year, the governor wants to generate $587 million in new taxes, fees, and other revenue. Under his plan, the state could raise approximately $150 million by eliminating an exemption on the state's 5 percent sales tax on alcohol, candy, soft drinks, and juice drinks [drinks that are less than 50% natural].
Based on the list of items he is suggesting we tax, it sounds a lot like a fat tax or maybe a glutton tax. In other words, these items he is suggesting we tax are all items one might consider nonessential. So by that logic we don't we begin to tax frozen pizza, navel oranges, english muffins, instant potatoes, or sliced bacon [all of which are on sale this week at your local Hannaford grocery store]? The reason is we currently do not tax food in this state regardless of it's health benefits or social status because it has been set forth as an essential need and therefore not taxable.
The ironic part of the Governor's plan is this new tax revenue is not going to be used to help cities and towns but rather it is going to be placed in a special health fund. So much for resolving the deficit and it looks like you better stock up on your alcohol, candy, soft drinks, and juice drinks before the tax man adds another 5% to your grocery bill.
I'm not sure why the folks behind Super Bowl XLIII would want to reject advertising from an organization such as PETA. I mean this is a group which sole purpose to create greater awareness of how animals are treated around the world. Let's take a look:
Oh never mind. I guess CBS is still be overly caution since Super Bowl XXXVIII's whole nipple gate scandal.
Ever want to design your own clothing? Do you like hoodies? If you answered yes to either [or both] of these questions, you much check out Champion's Hoodie Remix Challenge website. With their online design tool, you can create your own design with colors and patterns for 11 different elements of the hoodie including the front panels, arms, pocket, hood and back. You can even pick the color for the strings, trim and zipper. Here is what my first design looks like:
The winning design, which will be selected on May29th, will go into a limited production. The contest ends on March31st, so get your thinking cap on, sharpen your design skills and whip up your very own hoodie.
For years, the Mac community has been saying they as basically immune to viruses which would lead most to believe that the operating system is far suprior to windows and that is why viruses are so rare on the platform. They also based this former ad on that premice:
The truth of the matter is more likely that the Mac OS is used on a small percentage of desktops around the world so those who are into malicious software simply have been focusing on the major player. Well Mac has been contiually gaining markshare and with that comes their very own virus - the iServices.A Trojan horse is disguised as a bootleg copy of the new iWork 09. Once installed, the malware takes administrator access and connects to remote servers over the Internet, where it can be given additional instructions as the author commands, from installing additional malware to stealing information off the Mac in question. The malware creator can also take complete remote control of any compromised machine. Security firm Intego said that just 20,000 machines had been infected as of January 21 but that the risk of ongoing infection was "serious, and users may face extremely serious consequences" if they are stricken with the malware.
I guess that advertisement is no longer applicible. I'm a Mac and I'm a PC and we both get viruses now....
Star Wars: Retold by someone who has never seen it
Well that is sort-of-kind-of the story of the orginal trilogy. PS: Nice use of the Wilhelm Scream. Here are a few more times it has been used over the years.
The largest trade and consumer wine event in the country took place this past weekend at the Seaport World Trade Center in Boston and [again] it was truly overwhelming. With over 450 wineries from around the globe pouring 1,800+ wines for you to sample, you have to really focus in order to enjoy the event and take something away from it. We spent the majority of our time sampling wines from Spain, France and Italy. New this year was a self-service booth entitled the Navarra Wine Tunnel where you could discover the wines of The Kingdom of Navarra, Spain. I really enjoyed this departure from the traditional pourings done by winery or distributor representatives because it allowed to take at your own pace based on a pretty good written description. We also had the chance to speak to an Italy tourism representative about our 2010 trip we are planning, which was helpful. The only real disappointment was the lack of Long Island wineries since we are planning a long summer weekend on the north fork. Overall, though, it was a great day and hope we can attend again next year.
The Fast Lane was fully implemented in Massachusetts in 1999 and currently has 720,000 active customers. Those customers each paid $25.95 for the ability to pay their tools electronically. Over the past decade that amounts to some serious cash for the Massachusetts Turnpike Authority - at least $18 million dollars and probably much more if you consider customers who have needed to purchase replacements or those who came left the system in the past 10 years.
Faced with mounting pressure to reduce spending, increase revenues and the real possibility that the MTA could be merged with other departments [MBTA and the state Highway Department], the Authority has announced it will no longer charge the 26 bucks for their transponders but instead give them away for free.
"We are taking reform and customer service for Turnpike users to a new level," Transportation Secretary James Aloisi Jr. said in a statement. "This move sends a clear message that the Patrick Administration is serious about efficiency in delivering transportation services and in this case serious about moving away from the days of the manned toll booth."
What was not included in his statement was the little service fee that is going to be imposed on all customers for having the transponder. 50 cents a month will be charged per user regardless if you actually use the Fast Lane system or not. “We're not doing this to make money," said authority spokesman Mac Daniel. "We’re just hoping to simply break even."
Break even huh? Well let's consider the facts:
Total toll transactions in 2008: $190.0 Million Total toll transactions in 2007: $197.6 Million One year decline: $6.7 million or 3.4 percent
With the decline in overall toll revenue, the Authority is looking for ways to make up the difference. They are currently contemplating an increase bridge, tunnel and highway tolls in an effort to pay off Big Dig debt however now we are supposed to accept that free transponders are in the public's best interest not the MTA's.
Having to make up a deficit of nearly $7 million [and not to mention pay off Big Dig debts] in 2009, their new service fee will generate $4.3 million from their current subscribers. Unfortunately for those who have already bought the $26 transponder, you will pay for it again in just over 4 years. So I guess instead of the old rent-to-own methodology this is the new millennium's own-to-rent system and we get to pay for it over and over and over again.
With a new president, we the citizeens of the US get new methods of communcation:
The White House website has been revamped by Obama's media team which includes suprising candid bios of our past leaders and their time as commander-in-cheif.
For those of you who like the short blurts of data that is Twitter [half blog/half facebook], you can follow the White House via their online account.
Gone are the days of weekly radio addresses and now we have the official YouTube channel of the Office of the President-elect. Even #44 knows we are a video generation.
And finally, just for fun, you can Obamicon yourself. Not being all that photgenic, I went with another American Hero instead:
Last night was the first night of classes for WPI C Term [which is part-time, night students] and after dropping off my rather large check for the two classes I am taking at the accounting office, I made my way to the campus bookstore to pick up the serviously over priced books. Each of my classes require a single book bu the campus bookstore was currently out of both. I was told my the store manager that one was on back order and the other was on hold because of a publisher change of numbering. Also she commented that one of my classes had more students then expected. My reply was that since class started tonight, students kind of need their books now.
Having used their "back order" system, I left the bookstore with two pink slips of paper - one representing an order for each book. Pretty expensive paper when you consider I spent over $280 for them. Last semster I had a similar problem with materials for the one class I took and thought at the time that I had never had these problems in the past and now it seems to only be getting worse. If the campus bookstore continues down this quasi-just-in-time model, they are going to lose a ton of business to out side venders such as amazon next semster.
According to the United States Constitution Article II, Section 1, Clause 8, the oath of office of the President of the United States is as follows:
"I do solemnly swear that I will faithfully execute the Office of President of the United States, and will to the best of my Ability, preserve, protect and defend the Constitution of the United States."
[picture is not of my street but rather northern California]
We have been hearing about global warming for some time now but here in Massachusetts it doesn't seem so warm right now. According to the National Climate Data Center, we have seen a slight rise over the past 5 years in our winter [December to February] temperature:
At the same time we have been witness to some what erratic precipitation of the winter months except for this year so far:
Going back 20 years I couldn't find a winter here with more rain, sleet or snow then we are experiencing this winter. And with the below freezing weather we had over the past couple weeks I have begun to wonder if global warming actually exists. Sure we have all seen pictures of melted ice burgs and dried up lakes so maybe it just hasn't gotten here yet. Of course the piles of fluffy white snow might beg to differ.
Ever watch a game show and wonder why these people go on these shows? Well this film gives you one such tail. Slumdog Millionaire, based on the book Q and A by Indian author and diplomat Vikas Swarup, follows the story of a young boy Jamal who goes from living in the projects to working as a tea boy to playing India's version of Who Wants To Be A Millionaire.
The film gives us a sense of how poor other parts of the world can be and what these children will do to survive. While the plot lines of the one true love were a little predictable, the over all story is wonderfully written and the cast and cinematography made you feel like you were right there for the whole ride.
After a little better than .500 season - 9 and 7 - and many media types calling for an overhaul of the playoff system that kept the 11 and 5 New England Patriots [and two other 9 and 7 teams] out of the playoffs, it is great to see the Arizona Cardinals making the Super Bowl proving yet again pro sports is about teams winning at the right time, not winning all the time [see last year's super bowl as a recent example]. After 3 weeks and 3 wins, the Cardinals are on their way to their franchises first Super Bowl. The big game now features two teams with good quarterbacks [who both have won this before], tough defences and plenty of story lines. Should make for an excellent game. My apologies go out to all those Eagle [sorry John] and Ravens fans out there. Maybe next year.
I am going to call it now, Danny Gokey is going to win American Idol. I know we have only seen 2 auditions so far but given his talent, look and back story he has everything we need to root for him week in and week out. Check out his video:
After only a week, the Whopper Sacrifice was well sacrificed. Since it's release, 233,906 Facebook friends were removed by 82,771 people. As predicted, Facebook didn't take to kindly to the very-anti-social application and have it shut down. In a statement, Facebook pulled the plug under privacy concerns:
We encourage creativity from developers and brands using Facebook Platform, but we also must ensure that applications follow users’ expectations of privacy. This application facilitated activity that ran counter to user privacy by notifying people when a user removes a friend. We have reached out to the developer with suggested solutions. In the meantime, we are taking the necessary steps to assure the trust users have established on Facebook is maintained.
Like it or not, Facebook is all about building it's usership and let's face are going to control what happens on their platform. Afterall it is a business to them.
Season 8 of American Idol kicked off last night and the first episode already has given us a taste of the changes made by the shows producers and so far I think they are on the right track. First we now have a 4th judge and so far I like Kara and how she evaluates talent. The verbal skirmish with Bikini girl was a bit much but so is auditioning in a skimpy bikini and high heels:
But give [insert name here] credit, she made it to Hollywood with minimal talent and maximum exposure. The other change was to focus on good-o-great singers and no-so-much on the yearly freaks and 15-minute seekers. I found this to be refreshing because in past years some audition episodes were so painful to watch I would zip right through them.
One thing that hasn't changed is how goofy Ryan Seacrest is. When the show opened, we got the signature "This is American Idol" opening lines from Ryan as the camera panned over the Grand Canyon. Sorry Ryan, but that is the Grand Canyon not a singing completion. He even went as fat to try and high five a visually impaired contestant. Check it out:
Hopefully tonight, AI can pull back some of the Seacrestness and give us more of the singers.
Growing up in the 70's and 80's, Jim was always my favorite Red Sox and now he will properly join other before him in the Baseball Hall of Fame. Rice led the AL in home runs three times (1977, 1978, 1983), in RBI twice (1978, 1983), in slugging average twice (1977, 1978), and in total bases four times (1977-1979, 1983). He also picked up Silver Slugger awards in 1983 and 1984 (the award was created in 1980). Rice hit at least 39 home runs in a season four times, had eight 100-RBI seasons and four seasons with 200+ hits, and batted over .300 seven times. He finished his 16-year career with a .298 batting average, 382 home runs, 1,451 RBIs, 1,249 runs scored, 2,452 hits, and 4,129 total bases. He was an American League All-Star eight times (1977-1980, 1983-1986). In addition to winning the American League MVP award in 1978, he finished in the top five in MVP voting five other times (1975, 1977, 1979, 1983, 1986).
I [now] know that Rice was not a media guy when he was playing and that certainly didn't help get him elected by baseball writers but now after much time has passed and we have witnessed how artifical the steriod-ear stastistcs are, Jim [and his number 14 jersey] are home.
This race starts and ends at the Harpoon Brewery in the seaport district of Boston so for no other reason, you get to run right to a beer tent - which is frankly how every road race should end. Registration opens on April 1 - and no this is not an April Fools Day prank - so sign-up early because last year's race sold out in 3 weeks!
The 10th Annual Worcester Firefighters Memorial 6K Run & Walk has been a very hot race the last few years but as fund raisers go, this one hits closest to home. The family friendly atmosphere is such a terrific thing to see in a city like Worcester and the singing of the national anthem while you look at a flag hanging over the starting line thinking about 6 brave men who were lost in 1999 brings a tear to your eye every time.
This will be my first time running this 5k road race but I have heard very good things about the race and since the starting line is only 6 miles from my house, how can I not run it? Plus another road race [see Harpoon] which is raising money to find a cure for ALS is all good in my book.
Feel free to comment about other races that you think are worth running in the coming year.
First, I thought I was the only one with the complete Hollow Foreign Press action figure set? As for the end of the speech? Classic. So you can suck it Babsonlacrose, Dianefan, and Cougarletter. HusbandJeff, your ok because she loves you. Good job Tina. Keep up the good work [or you can suck it - just kidding].
The new Burger King Facebook application, called the Whopper Sacrifice, may help the chain drum up some business but might not gain them any friends from Facebook Corporate. The Whopper Sacrifice is a Facebook application which you can add to your profile and if you sacrifice, or remove from your account, 10 friends you will get a coupon for a free Whopper. According to their website [at the time of this post], they have 187,002 total sacrifices from Facebook on behalf of Burger King.
Two things occur to me as I contemplate this new wizz-bang BK application: 1. It is very anti-facebook and 2. Is disconnecting with 10 "friends" worth $2.69? Facebook, and all other social-networking sites are about connecting with people, old classmates, co-workers or new friends. Giving a free sandwich for those who decide to disconnect seems to go against everything a social-network is designed to be. I am curious if any upper management types of Facebook contacted a similar leveled employee at Burger King to discuss this new deconstructive application? Also is whacking 10 people who you have conscientiously added to your Facebook profile worth a free Whopper? In a country where obesity continues to climb at alarming rates, I would think not. Plus couldn't we all use a few more friends in life? Maybe if we were all just bit more friendly to people around us, we might just all be happier [and thinner for eating healthy instead of chowing down on a 530 calorie "sandwich"].
Former Boston College football coach Jeff Jagodzinski was hired 2 years ago, without any college head coaching experience, and given a 5 year contract. He was asked by BC athletic director Gene DeFilippo to not interview with any NFL teams and to instead focus on his job at the college. While Jagodzinski has aspirations to be a coach in the NFL, h also has 3 years left on his current contract that he signed in good faith with the college back in 2007. Jagodzinski did not respect the wishes of his employer and visited with the New York Jets to interview for their opening as a head coach. Well yesterday Jagodzinski received news that most people would when they defy their employer - your fired [wonder if DeFilippo used the Trump Cobra in the process??].
This is a sad story for the college who have been trying to continually build their program into a top 20 program but unfortunately Jagodzinski was only concerned for himself. I personally applaud BC for manning up and sending the coach packing. This shows that they are committed to building something and not just being a stepping stone for inexperienced coaches. Maybe Jagodzinski will get that dream job or maybe NFL owners will see a man who is only watching out for himself and has no locality to his employer.
Dr. Richard Batista, a surgeon at Nassau University Medical Center, has thrown a huge wrnch into his nearly four-year old divorce proceeding - he wants his kidney back. Dr. Batista wants his estranged wife to return the kidney he donated to her, although he says he'll settle for $1.5 million in compensation. Dr. Batista donated his kidney to his then wife Dawnell Batista, in June 2001. She filed for divorce in July 2005.
While divorce is never a good situation, this obvious publicity stunt shows how bad it has gotten for this couple which must be absolute hell for their three children, aages 8, 11 and 14. Someimes you hear people saying stay together for the kids, well I say in this case break up for the kids and try to make their life as normal as it will ever get again.
When we last saw the staff of Sacred Heart Hospital, Dr. John "JD" Dorian continues to balance his new fatherhood with his continued on-again/off-again pursuit of Elliot, Dr. Elliot Reid continues to be close with JD while growing in her own role as a private physician, Dr. Christopher Duncan Turk and Head Nurse Carla Espinosa continue to work to figure out the whole newly married and parenting, Dr. Percival "Perry" Cox is loving his new title of interim Chief of Medicine, The Janitor [still unnamed] has a girl friend named Lady, Dr. Bob "Who's got two thumbs and doesn't give a damn" Kelso is retired but something tells me he will be back.
As we wait for the first two episodes tonight, here is a recap/funny bits from last year's strike shortened season:
Showtime's new dark comedy, United States of Tara, follows a typical family with one very untypical element - Tara the mother who is afflicted with dissociative identity disorder. Tara's disorder has four different personalities within herself, all vastly different from the other:
Tara - Tara is a hard working mother of two who paints nursery room murals. She loves her family and often feels guilty for the frequent bizarre events she puts them through, and sometimes doesn't feel like herself. Alice - Alice is the perfect homemaker who believes in good, traditional values. Alice bakes for the family and labels herself as old fashioned. Buck - Buck is Tara's only male personality; he loves beer and he loves motorcycles, has a habit of getting into fights and enjoys outings to the titty bar during evenings. He also differs from the other personalities by being left-handed. T - T is a wild, pot smoking teenager who relates well to Tara's daughter and loves to get some action and has a habit of stealing from the drug store.
Watching Toni Collette portray four distinct characters is an outstanding piece of acting and the writing how the family unit deals and protects her [from herself at times] looks very sharp. For a limited time, you can watch the pilot episode online via the Showtime VIP insider - password tara. This could be yet another Showtime series that is popular for it's true originality.
The Arizona Cardinals and the Minnesota Vikings currently have not sold out their home wild-card games for this weekend and if they are left with empty seats, the games will not be broadcast locally. It is well known that the economy is suffering right now, but it is interesting that the greater Pheonix area hasn't ralliedc around their team - since they have not hosted a playoff game since 1947 when they played in Chiacgo and it has been 10 years since they last made the playoffs. One would think the local's would really, really, really want to go to the game. Instead they are coming up short and have gone as far to partner with a local company to try an get the rest of the tickets sold. Leslie's Swimming Pool Supplies, the nation's leading retailer of swimming pool supplies and related products, announced that the company has partnered with the Arizona Cardinals and has stepped up to purchase a large block of tickets to assist the Cardinals in their efforts to sell-out the game.
Customers who purchase $100 or more in pool supplies from a Phoenix-area location will receive two free tickets to the Cardinals-Falcons Wild Card game. Supplies are limited, and this offer is only valid during Leslie's business hours on Friday, January 2 through noon on Saturday, January 3.
I'm guessing Leslie's got a sweet deal on all those tickets if they can afford to give away 2 tickets for free with a $100 purchase. On the plus side, a portion of the tickets will also be donated to the Boys and Girls Club of Metropolitan Phoenix. Let's hope everyone gets what they want for the first weekend of playoff football.
Growing up in the 70's and 80's, Jim was always my favorite Red Sox and now he will properly join other before him in the Baseball Hall of Fame. Rice led the AL in home runs three times (1977, 1978, 1983), in RBI twice (1978, 1983), in slugging average twice (1977, 1978), and in total bases four times (1977-1979, 1983). He also picked up Silver Slugger awards in 1983 and 1984 (the award was created in 1980). Rice hit at least 39 home runs in a season four times, had eight 100-RBI seasons and four seasons with 200+ hits, and batted over .300 seven times. He finished his 16-year career with a .298 batting average, 382 home runs, 1,451 RBIs, 1,249 runs scored, 2,452 hits, and 4,129 total bases. He was an American League All-Star eight times (1977-1980, 1983-1986). In addition to winning the American League MVP award in 1978, he finished in the top five in MVP voting five other times (1975, 1977, 1979, 1983, 1986).
The new Burger King Facebook application, called the 
When we last saw the staff of Sacred Heart Hospital, Dr. John "JD" Dorian continues to balance his new fatherhood with his continued on-again/off-again pursuit of Elliot, 
