Bottom Of The Barrel

The Bro Code

As first mentioned in the episode The Goat, The Bro Code by Barney Stinson was release back on October 14th. Here is a clip regarding it's origin:



Having thumbed through the book, here are some of my favorite codes:

Article 1: Bro's before ho's.
Article 4: A Bro never divulges the existence of the Bro Code to a woman.
Article 16: A Bro should be able, at any time, to recite the following reigning champions: Super Bowl, World Series and Playmate of the Year.
Article 20: A Bro respects his Bros in the military because they've selflessly chosen to defend the nation but more to the point, because they can kick his ass six ways to Sunday.
Article Article 24: When wearing a baseball cap, a Bro may position the brim at either 12 or 6 o'clock. All other angles are reserved for rappers and the handicapped.
Article 26: Unless he has children, a Bro shall never wear his cell phone on a belt clip.
Article 30: A Bro doesn't comparison shop.
Article 38: Even in a fight to the death, a Bro never punches another Bro in the groin.
Article 41 A Bro never cries [except when watching Field of Dreams, ET or a sports legend retire].
Article 52: A Bro is not required to remember another Bro's birthday, though a phone call every now and again probably wouldn't kill him.
Article 72: A Bro never spell-checks.
Article 84: A Bro shall stop whatever he is doing and watch Die Hard if it is on TV [Ditto for The Shawshank Redemption, Top Gun, The Big Lebowski, and the first half of Full Metal Jacket].
Article 91: If a group of Bro's suspect that their Bro is trying to give himself a nickname, they shall rally to call him by an adjacent yet more demeaning nickname.
Article 93: Bro's don't speak French to each other.
Article 107: A Bro never leaves another Bro hanging.
Article 118: When a Bro is with his Bros, he is not a vegetarian.
Article 122: A Bro is always psyched. Always.
Article 129: If a Bro lends another Bro a DVD, video game, or a piece of lawn equipment, he shall not expect to ever get it back, unless his Bro happens to die and bequeath it back to him.

And last, but certainly not least:

Amendment VIII: A Bro may toss the Bro Code out the window if Scandinavian twins are involved in an capacity.

The Bro Code would make an excellent stocking stuffer this holiday season for the Bro in your life.

Labels: Book Review

posted by TheWino @ 10:29 AM